Have you ever envisaged the weird ways you’re going to receive a frightful guest like death when it comes at a time which is most unlikely to you?Can you evict the entire situation just by trying to convince your Master vocalising ‘No, I am not ready yet.’ Throwing tantrums on a such a dreadful fellow wouldn’t be of much use. You can’t put off the inevitable s on your priority list, is what you claim, when your ghastly friend awaits you, however under prepared you are, your family is, you just need to pause. Having asked all these questions to my sane sensibilities, I am still left clueless of the eerie response it may evoke in a silly creature like me.
Am I going to tell my queasy friend that he’s not that scary as he appear like, he has a friend in him too. He is too bound by rules, and execute his master’s orders! He’s not a sadist, I am certain, not to give any signals/issue a short notice before he comes to take me. He may appear at least in my dreams prior to my leaving(I have heard people to die soon get such dreams, dreams of death). He may give me a day’s time to settle the accounts of relationships I have. He may ask me my last wish and may also help me fulfil it.If no one is going to grieve my absence, he is going to sit near me, pat me with his dusky hands and sympathise with me.
Thinking about the impact my death can cause, I believe, not a grieving heart may prolong to weep on and on. A few tears may be shed, but it may get dried very soon. The only one offspring I have may find it difficult for few days to get things easily done, but gradually she will become completely independent. She will be soon matured enough to understand the realities of life.A picture of mine with a garland, placed on the wall can surely substitute my presence. The same picture,later could be dusted once or twice and later while painting the wall, it could be replaced by a costly piece of art. The mortal remains of me will find its place in some river and once in a year, if they felt convenient, may perform rites to save my soul so that it doesn’t wander.
On my death, some may praise my good deeds or my qualities(if any), some may still curse me and look at my body with contempt. Some may bring few flowers to be kept on me.The only piece of jewellery I have on my body will be removed. Some may sit surrounding my dead body and sob when it’s taken to the pyre. Soon my last rites will be performed and I will be sent empty handed and empty minded. Some may even claim that because of the perfection in performing my last rites, I, for sure, directly reach heaven.
“I have been for years obsessed with the idea of death.I have come to believe that life is a mere dream and that death is the only reality. It’s endless, stretching before and beyond our human existence. To slide into it will be to pick up a new significance. Life has been,despite all emotional involvements, as ineffectual as writing on moving water. We have been mere participants in someone else’s dream.” This extract taken from the closing chapter of ‘My Story’ by Kamala Das has said it all. Accepting the reality of death, we need to follow its will, just like a dog following its master.
But as it’s not the time, I will just plead him “to Pause.” I will recite the last lines of ‘Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening’ to my new friend,
And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep...